The Hat Simulator

[FadedOasis]

This event is being run by Xadera. Here's his decsription.

Knocking on the door to the office that was advertising a once in a lifetime opportunity for wealth, you wait a few moments before it slowly opens. Behind it, a beautiful young woman, with ample curves from top to bottom, greets you with a smile.

"Hello, come on in and sit down," she giggles as she turns to guide you through the large room.

You quickly realize how scantily clad this gorgeous greeter is as most of her body peeks through the bikini, which consists of two Nappers' strung together by a vMirror for the top and a dainty vProcedure Mask for the bottom with a Medal pinning it from behind. Her Max's ears bounce atop her head as she listens to her Earbuds that nestles into her cleavage. She brings you to a chair before an ornate desk that sits in front of a massive vault door. Sitting down, she turns to face you, hopping up onto the desk.

"He'll be right with you, he's just messing with his treasure," she motions to the vault behind her. She lifts a leg and slowly crosses it over the other. As you gawk at the view, you could have sworn you saw a vBrain Slug staring back at you.

A few awkward minutes pass and the vault door cracks open. Divine light escapes through the crack as a tall man passes through. He turns and shuts the door behind him, making sure it locks. Again, you quickly realize the man is wearing nothing but a Bill's Hat and a vWhiskers. Well, he's also wearing an extravagant suit of the finest fabrics, but it's nothing in comparison.

"So, you're another one looking to get a little richer, hmm? Well, let me ask you something. What do you think I keep in this vault?" He pauses and waits through a couple of seconds of your silence. "Only the most valuable things in this world... HATS! No matter where you go, hats are what people want. Do you know how much Bunny's outfit cost?!" He lifts his cane and taps her bosom, making the pom poms of the Nappers' jiggle around. "Too much, that's what! ...Anyways, now that Bunny has obtained the outfit she has always wanted, she thought it would be nice to give back to the peasa-... er, people, by giving them a chance to get a hat of their own. Usually I've seen this done as a hat raffle. But, who needs a hat raffle when you can have hat carnage. I thought it would be interesting to see what lengths people would go to in the pursuit of riches. So, if you want to participate in this wealth simulator of mine, Bunny will set you up."

The young woman whips out an Ambassador in each hand (from you probably don't want to know where) and flashes you a vicious grin.

----------------------------

Welcome to the Hat Simulator!

The rules are quite simple.

Each person that chooses to participate must give Xadera the entry fee of one scrap metal. In return, you'll get one 5-use Dueling Mini-Game.

During the event period, Friday the 12th at 5:00 pm to Sunday the 15th at 10:00 pm (EST), you may use that Mini Game up to the 5 times on the MKWEA server against anybody else on the server.

Screenshot the result of each duel and post the image to this thread.

Most duel wins wins the simulation ^^

Extra stuff:

- Winning a duel against someone else participating in the simulator counts as 2 wins instead (and +2 to the kills of each side, for tie-breaker purposes), so weigh your options carefully. This means maximum number of possible wins is 10!
- Ties will be broken by the number of total kills in the end, so posting your loss will still be worthwhile (and will be expected).
- This will be based on trust. You can theoretically use outside Mini Games to get more wins and just submit the best screenshots, but then you'd be a douche and we'd all hate you. I'll also be regularly checking your backpacks, just to make sure
-Oh, and the prizes:

1st - Choose any hat of your choice with a value less than 2 from this thread and Xadera will obtain it and give it to you.
2nd - Black/White paint or a Nametag
3rd - Whatever 2nd didn't choose
4th - A random extra Polycount weapon



There are 10 Mini Games available at the moment, but more can be obtained if more people want to participate.

[xadera]

lol, I totally shouldn't have written this up while playing Magic. The story is so bad and well below my usual writing standards XD Oh well, it's not like it's the point of this thing.

Anyways, another aside, I won't be taking scrap/giving out Mini Games until we're closer to the event. Please post or send me a PM if you want to participate so I know how many Mini Games I need and so I can make a list ahead of time ^^

And for those who aren't aware, to use a Mini Game you must equip it to the Action Slot of the class you want to start the duel with (you can still change classes before a duel). To activate it, you have to press the Action key (you may have to check your key binds in Options to find what it is). Once you press it, it's fairly straightforward from there, just choose someone on the opposing team and challenge them.

A few things to note about dueling, in case you haven't before. A duel ends when the round ends, so rounds that are short like on KoTH maps will mean a shorter duel then a 5-point CP map. Defending means you'll be alive less often than when attacking, but the attacking player will eventually have to come to you as well. If you don't kill each other before the end of the duel, the duel will be refunded and won't count against your 5 uses. However, if you tie in a duel it will count and nobody gets the win (though the kills will still count towards tie-breakers for the event). If you leave or switch teams in the middle of the round, you automatically forfeit and may have no screenshot to count towards your kills (I think this prevents you from being autobalanced, though).

If you have any questions, feel free to ask ^^

Potential candidates:

Whatsit - ARMED
yousteppedonmycake
Pnuema
Wheeze?
Rhench - ARMED

[Whatsit]

FWIW here's some oddities I've found while dueling:

If you start a duel after the last round on a map (i.e. during the last humiliation) it counts as one use and you don't get it refunded, so watch the map timer. Map changes if the round ends at < 5 minutes left.
If you duel someone and then the teams scramble so you're both on the same team, the duel isn't canceled (though will likely end at 0-0, possibly healing spied notwithstanding, which I really really want to have happen one day)
Likewise if you're dueling someone and one person manually changes team the duel isn't canceled. Anyone doing this to win a duel will be tarred and feathered.

[yousteppedonmycake]

Do want. Consider me in. I'm a bit low on scrap right now / crates gave me s*** / it will be a bit 'till I have scrap.

So, just to get this straight, 5 duel max, right?

And Whatsit... Oh, my, do you realize how hot the tar would have to be to feather a person? *Shudder*

[Whatsit]

Oh right, I should say that I'm theoretically interested, and will commit myself closer to the actual date, when I actually know what I'm doing then. To the event that is, not the tarring and feathering.

Nov 3, 2010 17:41:05 GMT -5 @yousteppedonmycake said:

And Whatsit... Oh, my, do you realize how hot the tar would have to be to feather a person? *Shudder*

I am curious, actually.

Sidenote: I was only 99% sure this wouldn't work: www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=temperature+of+tar+required+to+adhere+feathers
The person whose job it is to find failed queries and implement them is going to have a rather odd day when he gets to that one.

[yousteppedonmycake]

I do believe it would have to be very, very hot, near-boiling even.

From my experience with tar, I can tell you that most non-urgent roof repairs involving tar are usually done in mid-summer, due to the high heat required for tar to be usable. I can tell you that it is nearly impossible to get it off the skin without petrolium products. [/ Personal Experience]

*HISTORY CLASS MEMORY, ENGAGE!* If I do recall correctly, those directly involved in the collection of taxes during the Stamp Tax of the American colonies were often tarred and feathered if not of the gentleman, royality, or nobility class. Such tarred men were often described by doctors after the tarring as "poor souls" and these doctors wrote in medical reports that "the flesh gradually peeled off of their back in layers."

Point of this message: Please don't tar anyone.

[xadera]

Well, just so people know, I'll still be running this whether there's only 2 people or 10 people, because I don't want to wait any longer than I have to So, even if nobody else joins, somebody's getting a hat this weekend XD

[Doctor Wheeze]

I just used all my metal to craft a fez, but if I get some more I'll join in.

[xadera]

You can just give me any two weapons too, if you don't have a scrap. I mostly just want to have an entry fee that will help make sure people actually play, as well as offset the costs of however dueling games I need.

[Whatsit]

I'm in!

[pneuma08]

I'll play. I'd like to get some more duels under my belt anyhow.

[xadera]

Event starts in an hour. I'll give people the Dueling Mini-Games when they come on and if anybody else wants to join the event while it's running just let me know! (You'll just have less time than the others)

[yousteppedonmycake]

Considering that I'll be getting back home at eleven, I probably won't be able to play tonight. If the event continues tommorow, then I can play. But i probably won't because of my Black Ops addiction. Cherio!

[xadera]

The event is from an hour ago until 10 pm Sunday. It doesn't matter if other people in the event are playing at the time (though it can be helpful), as you can duel anybody on the MKWEA server within that time period.

In other words, the event is loose, there are no specific times you have to play as long as you play within the weekend time-period.

[xadera]

Oh, and quick note, if you are challenged to duel by another participant, you are not obligated to accept. The only advantage to accepting a duel from someone else is the potential to make them waste one of their uses yourself (plus the slight tie-breaker boost). You can also feel free to use whatever normal means necessary to interfere with the duel of another, such as helping the person being dueled or smack-talk to mess with the other player's game.

[rhench]

I guess I'm in.

[pneuma08]

D'oh, forgot that I would be working this evening, and I was busy the last couple of days, too. I might still be able to get some in, hopefully the server will be full the ~3 hours I'll be available.

[Whatsit]

I got Rhench! Aand I won't have time to play again tonight so I guess that's my score.

[pneuma08]

Yeah, the event ends in a little more than an hour and no one is on the server. I think you win, Whatsit!

[rhench]

Aw, I just got back and thought I had until 12 Central. McDamn. My quest for a Tyrolean goes on.

[rhench]

My only duels were 2 losses against Whatsit, not counting the one he posted. So yeah, no points.

[xadera]

Well, judging by the extraordinarily small amount of participation, Whatsit is the winner, with 2 points from the single duel!

As such, lemme know what hat you want Whatsit.

And as runner-up, Rhench, with 0 points, you get your choice of Black/White paint or a Name Tag!

Oh, and if anybody else had actually bothered to play for 5 duels and got 3 wins, you would have beat Whatsit

[rhench]

White paint plox.

[Whatsit]

Hooray! People's indifference won me a fancy new Attendant! Much thanks to Xadera for running the event and actually coming through on the prize.

[xadera]

Thanks for participating and congrats to you two ^^